Dallas Flashes Back to 1997

Adios, Mike: Dallas County Constable Mike Dupree resigns, ending a months-long controversy that began when he admitted to the Observer that he arranged for the deportation of a former lover to Honduras. His resignation comes as part of a guilty plea to a misdemeanor charge of abuse of official capacity, which stemmed from numerous allegations of sexual harassment of his male employees. As part of his plea agreement, Dupree promises not to seek public office again in Texas, and all other pending criminal investigations and civil suits against him will be dropped. The veteran lawman vows to use his now free time mentoring young people. "There just aren't that many programs available to help svelte Latino immigrants ages 19 to 22 out there, and that's a group I'm committed—very, very committed—to helping out in any way I can," he says.

Busy, busy, busy: The Morning News reports that a sheriff's department employee hired to write requests for grants had filed only one grant application in 14 months on the job. The employee, Cynthia Smith, was hired at an annual salary of $49,179 to a position created at the request of Sheriff Valdez. The one grant application Smith wrote was filed late, the News writes. Valdez was out of the country when the story broke and did not speak to the paper's reporter, but returns two weeks later and tells the newspaper that her employee actually filed two applications. The sheriff's media coach comes up with a new, abbreviated list of suggestions for her: "First, stay out of the country as long as you can; second, don't talk to reporters."

Green dumb: A helicopter pilot discovers a field of 325 marijuana plants growing along the Trinity River just a few hundred yards behind the regional headquarters of the FBI and Drug Enforcement Administration, one of several sizable pot patches found in the Dallas area in 2007. A local DEA official expresses surprise at the odd location of the find. "Really, a pot field near our offices? Like, wow, we're, um, so surprised, you know. Like, um, we really didn't expect anyone to find that there. I mean, expect it to be there. Yeah, that's it."

A real Lady: Lady Bird Johnson dies, causing Texas bluebonnets to turn a little bit bluer this year. Again, this is not exactly a Dallas item, but we mention it because A) she was cool, and B) odds are she won't be neighbors with Jerry Falwell in the afterlife, if you get our drift.

Taking flight: Southwest Airlines founder Herb Kelleher announces that he will step down as the company chairman next May after 41 years of service at the low-cost carrier. Airline officials say they will go all out commemorating Kelleher's departure and schedule a retirement party that will feature two bags of peanuts and discounted $4 tiny bottles of booze for every guest. Seating at the party will be first come, first served.

A river runs through it: City officials confirm that opponents of the proposed toll road along the Trinity River have acquired enough signatures on a petition to force a public vote on the issue in November. Mayor Tom Leppert reveals that the city plans to refer some of the signatures to District Attorney Craig Watkins to investigate whether they were falsified. Leppert says the suspicious signatures, too few in number to invalidate the petition, were sent to Watkins in the "interest of full disclosure and to screw that damned Angela Hunt and her hippie tree-hugging cohort." Watkins vows to spare no expense investigating the petitions "unless something more important comes up, like freeing wrongfully imprisoned men or prosecuting vicious criminals."

They like Mike: Former Cowboys wide receiver Michael Irvin is admitted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio, in a tearful ceremony in which he thanks his wife, Sandy, for sticking by his side through his notorious years of parties, womanizing and drugs. The contrite Irvin, who has entered a new chapter in his life thanks to counseling from Dallas' Bishop T.D. Jakes, also expresses gratitude to members of Ohio's law enforcement community for not searching the car he drove to the induction ceremony.

WWJD? Not this: The High Point Church in Arlington withdraws an offer to be the site of a funeral for a gay man, Cecil Sinclair, after learning that photos at the service would include images of men hugging and kissing. Officials fear the service might convey the impression that the church endorses homosexuality, which it considers a sin. "Love the sinner, hate the sin and bury the gay guy at a crossroads at midnight is our motto," says a spokesman for the church, which announces that it will also remove images of Jesus' betrayal with a kiss and his crucifixion wearing a loin cloth because "it's just too damn sexy."